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| Blogs > MissAnnThrope > Misanthropic Ramblings |
Remember That Cult I Want To Start?
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Remember That Cult I Want To Start? For the past week or so, they've been dropping like flies. Which of course, lets us all tap into our senses of mortality. The bigger the news, the more people talk, the more they compare their ages to the ages of the deceased. Which leads to more people starting to think along the lines of the religious. Last week, while listening to people in a debate room go on about the death of a drug addled well-known has-been who was about to attempt a comeback, I realized something. About Jesus. Some of you will consider this mockery, but I want you all to look at the evidence. Jesus has been back, but no one noticed. All they saw was a rabble-rouser. But it is so obvious. Both Jesus and this man were rabble-rousers. Hippie liberals who were working for social change. Both preached peace. Both were persecuted for their views. Both were brought to trial. Both disappeared for years. Both committed suicide. Granted, Jesus went for suicide by Roman soldiers, but that does count as suicide. Going by the bible description of Jesus, they had the same dark skin, the same hair like wool and the same eyes of fire. Both were mostly rejected in their own time. But the social change both brought about has lasted to this day and age. Even the signs of their times still exist. Both the cross and the peace sign, which still hang around the necks of believers. Both were accused of subversion by the bourgeoisie. I am talking about... Abbie Hoffman. I can't believe how obvious the evidence is and how we haven't noticed. We should be ashamed of ourselves. Sure, Abbie didn't spend his time healing the sick or turning water into wine. Oh no. Modern audiences would have been looking for the mirrors offstage. Abbie knew this, so he turned things theatrical. Because in a society where everyone is glued to the TV screen, theatrics are what people will believe in. Jesus spent seven weeks in the desert. Abbie Hoffman spent seven years in hiding, which is a desert of sorts. He had to reinvent himself. Reinvent himself he did. As time and his appearance passed, he under a new name got involved in saving the St. Lawrence River. Environmentalism became his cause and he even wrote for a travel magazine as he roamed the country. Hoffman ended up being diagnosed as bipolar after all those years in hiding. If you read the various gospels, you will see Jesus definitely had his bipolar moments. Then there are the ones that surrounded the two of them. Jerry Rubin was definitely Judas. He sold out the cause in favor of becoming filthy rich, just as Judas sold out for a few pieces of silver. Even his death brings parallels. Did Judas die hanging himself, or was he disemboweled in a field? Did Rubin die as a direct result of being hit by a car, or would have have had that heart attack either way? Tom Hayden is the reincarnation of Peter. He has never lost the faith. He didn't join the system to sell out as Rubin did, but to continue social change as a fiery liberal. He still fights the good fight and keeps the spirit alive. David Dellinger wasn't like the rest of them. Much older, from a wealthy family, faded into obscurity after the trial. But he never stopped fighting for social change, even though few listened. Few cared what he had to say and he was martyred again, in memory of the cause in 1996. He is Andrew, whose gospel was cut out of the final cut of the bible as apocryphal. Then there was MC5. The band that played the Chicago convention, with their rallying cry of "Kick Out The Jams." This song was updated and code to let us all know that Jesus and his disciples were back. It hinted at the money lenders of the temples. Alas, the true meaning of the song was lost. For anyone who is waiting for the Rapture or the Three Days of Darkness mentioned in the bible, those things are passed. The 1968 Chicago Democratic Convention were those three days of darkness and the demons crawling destroying anyone who ventured out onto the streets were the Chicago PD, under the direction of Satan himself, Mayor Richard J. Daley. I think it's time to recognize these men and the others for what they were. Prophets. So, how is that for an original idea for the cult? Heretical or so obvious you can't believe you've never noticed? BTW, since we're supposed to mention this stuff, this is my 500th post. I know, I know, it took me long enough. I think it's rather fitting it comes on the heels of Mariano Rivera's 500th Major League save. Thank you, ESPN, for showing the game! |
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Why not? Jesus had his uncannily similar predecessors: Krishna, Horus, Adonis etc, Problem is that a religion this new might not take. People are more willing to follow something thousands of years old, no matter how stupid. age = legitimacy for whatever reason I mean are Scientologists really any more bizarre than Christians when you really think about it. John Lee Hooker Recommended: [blog lucyjane78]
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As a member of Crackpot Religions Unlimited... I vote for MISSANN!!!
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6/29/2009 4:11 pm |
You remind me of Jane Alpert.....Just kidding. I was going to start a "First Church of Hipocracy, Reformed" but, that game is pretty well played out and the competition for souls is cutthroat especially in hard economic times. Good luck, though!
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6/30/2009 12:05 am |
They were all Commies. If you start a new religion based on technology like ipod it will be a sure fire hit.
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6/30/2009 4:14 am |
Another new church originating in the US based on American social conflict. You could call it The Later Day Church of Later Day Saints. 
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Congratulations hun on 500 posts You lost me on the post,i don't know half the people you mentioned  I'm a   and i'm here to stay
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6/30/2009 6:07 am |
I do not know of these prophets. Please consider this Islam is fastest religion growing in the world today. If you convert to Islam the King of Saudi Arabia will give you great reward. If you start a new religion it will not give you a reward. Please for Ladies [post 1995501]
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I do not know of these prophets. Please consider this Islam is fastest religion growing in the world today. If you convert to Islam the King of Saudi Arabia will give you great reward. If you start a new religion it will not give you a reward.  I'm a and i'm here to stay
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P.S. Will there be cake or pie and punch? I can find some devil dongs to bring.... 
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Rofl sounds a bit more believable then ninety percent of religions out there . Gratz on 500
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6/30/2009 10:25 pm |
What is the king offering,i just might convert for a week or two Also in the Holy Quran, God states: “If anyone desires a religion other than Islam, never will it be accepted of him; and in the Hereafter, he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (their selves in the Hellfire).” (Quran 3:85) Muhammad, the Prophet of God, said: “Whoever testifies that there in none worthy of being worshipped but God, Who has no partner, and that Muhammad is His slave and Prophet, and that Jesus is the Slave of God, His Prophet, and His word[1] which He bestowed in Mary and a spirit created from Him; and that Paradise (Heaven) is true, and that the Hellfire is true, God will eventually admit him into Paradise, according to his deeds.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari) The Prophet of God, may the blessing and mercy of God be upon him, also said: “God has forbidden to reside eternally in Hell the person who says: “I testify that none has the right to worship except Allah (God),’ seeking thereby the Face of God.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari) To convert to Islam and become a Muslim you a mere woman need only to pronounce the below testimony with conviction and understanding its meaning: I testify “La ilah illa Allah, Muhammad rasoolu Allah.” In the English this says: “I testify that there is no true god (deity) but God (Allah), and that Muhammad is a Messenger (Prophet) of God.” Please for Ladies [post 1995501]
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7/1/2009 8:04 pm |
Sounds like a goer to me Miss Ann.What's the chances of me heading up your Australian franchise? We belong on the other side of the looking glass,Alice
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Why not? Jesus had his uncannily similar predecessors: Krishna, Horus, Adonis etc, Problem is that a religion this new might not take. People are more willing to follow something thousands of years old, no matter how stupid. age = legitimacy for whatever reason I mean are Scientologists really any more bizarre than Christians when you really think about it. I think this could work.
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Sadly, I am still in Oklahoma. I'm starting to believe what people say about Oklahoma not letting people out until they're ready. As far as the subway series, I got to see the last game. ESPN cares, when no one else does. And thanks. I can't believe I let myself sit at 499 posts for so long. Especially with all the political news that has been around. I'm so slipping.
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As a member of Crackpot Religions Unlimited... I vote for MISSANN!!!
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Tom Hayden as Saint Peter, hmm. Peter denied Christ three times before the cock crowed, and was crucified upside down, well maybe he is upside down on his mortgage and the bank is crucifying him. I just switched from the Holy Church of LSD to the Church of the 7 Sacred Equations, I'm not ready to switch again. Too bad you've left the Church of LSD. It would tie in nicely with Abbie Hoffman as Jesus.
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You remind me of Jane Alpert.....Just kidding. I was going to start a "First Church of Hipocracy, Reformed" but, that game is pretty well played out and the competition for souls is cutthroat especially in hard economic times. Good luck, though! The entire Church of Hipocrasy movement has been played out. Hell, even the number of Subgenii seem to be decreasing. There are a few atheist churches, which I so don't get. But some people even once they lose their beliefs have trouble moving on, I guess.
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They were all Commies. If you start a new religion based on technology like ipod it will be a sure fire hit.
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Another new church originating in the US based on American social conflict. You could call it The Later Day Church of Later Day Saints. But it would seem the Mormons have about as big a warchest as Scientology, which means if I stole from their name, they could sue me easily. After all, look at what they did with Prop 8 in California.
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Congratulations hun on 500 posts You lost me on the post,i don't know half the people you mentioned The people I mentioned were in the news constantly here in the late 1960s. Abbie Hoffman was the man behind the Yippie movement. Sadly, too many Yippies turned Yuppie. But if you feel like looking them up, it was a very interesting time in American History.
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I do not know of these prophets. Please consider this Islam is fastest religion growing in the world today. If you convert to Islam the King of Saudi Arabia will give you great reward. If you start a new religion it will not give you a reward.
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What is the king offering,i just might convert for a week or two
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I don't know any or most of these people, but count me in -- let us all believe in the old new time religion {while we wait for Barack to walk on water -- you knew I was going to take that, right }. I must, yes must pimp this. See ya around the tent...will there be snakes? {Haven't had any in a while and craving some sauteed }But look up the life of Abbie Hoffman and how he was persecuted and you will see the similarities.
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P.S. Will there be cake or pie and punch? I can find some devil dongs to bring.... I am thinking that communion should be a silver dollar pancake and a shot of espresso. Hoffman would have enjoyed the whimsy of that.
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Rofl sounds a bit more believable then ninety percent of religions out there .Gratz on 500
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Greetinga unto you sister. The path to Islam is easy or hard for each person. Our Holy Quran and God states: “...The only religion in the sight of God is Islam...” (Quran 3:19) Also in the Holy Quran, God states: “If anyone desires a religion other than Islam, never will it be accepted of him; and in the Hereafter, he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (their selves in the Hellfire).” (Quran 3:85) Muhammad, the Prophet of God, said: “Whoever testifies that there in none worthy of being worshipped but God, Who has no partner, and that Muhammad is His slave and Prophet, and that Jesus is the Slave of God, His Prophet, and His word[1] which He bestowed in Mary and a spirit created from Him; and that Paradise (Heaven) is true, and that the Hellfire is true, God will eventually admit him into Paradise, according to his deeds.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari) The Prophet of God, may the blessing and mercy of God be upon him, also said: “God has forbidden to reside eternally in Hell the person who says: “I testify that none has the right to worship except Allah (God),’ seeking thereby the Face of God.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari) To convert to Islam and become a Muslim you a mere woman need only to pronounce the below testimony with conviction and understanding its meaning: I testify “La ilah illa Allah, Muhammad rasoolu Allah.” In the English this says: “I testify that there is no true god (deity) but God (Allah), and that Muhammad is a Messenger (Prophet) of God.”
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*Passes you a Cape Codder* You've got to admit, the propaganda is wonderful. Read it after the drink and it will all be clear.
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Ah, but that fake prophet, Harold Camping from Family Radio Stations has his followers spamming the internet with how the Rapture is going to be May 2011 and the end of the world, October 2011. Forget those seven years after the Rapture the Bible mentions. Then again, he's predicted this every few years since at least 1994. So I'm not too worried about ANY end of the world prophecies. Except for that one in about 4.5 billion years when the sun swells into a red giant and the Earth ends up frying. So MzHuny is who has Jimmie Hoffa locked away? Wow. Good for her!
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Thanks. It wasn't too bad this year. No major injuries for once.
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Sounds like a goer to me Miss Ann.What's the chances of me heading up your Australian franchise?
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Thank you.
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I do not believe in religion.
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Is she going to pick Sally Kern as her running mate?
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I do not believe in religion.
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Actually, I was gone for a while myself. I had lost my muse. It's back for the moment, though.
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